Wot?

Uhh, wot, bruv?... U take candle-lit baths? U watch DVD commentreez jus 4 a larf? Thats epic fail m8, u r probs a bit queer. If u hang out wiv me + Fozza, we'll show u Top Gear. Theres loadsa wicked cars + they say cheeky things. And a man who's a hamster; them geezers are kings. WOT?? U eat rice cakes and lentils? Weak! I like crisps, meat, and bacon; thems my fundementalz. If you like eatin that, wot else cud be rong...I bet u ride ponies, and write wanky songs. Man, I'll txt Hurty Haz, + tell him bout you. He'll fuckin piss himself, he's thug thru and thru. Wot I'll do iz, I'll give u sum propa advice. You should work on ur banta, it's a bitchin device, 4 sayin mean things, but keepin it lite. Me + the ladz always do it, it shows that we'r tight. L8er then boss, got to get into town, Gary the Hammer is gonna happyslap sum clown. Lol.